To some people, finding the perfect mate is one of the most significant decisions we make in a lifetime. Many find a partner early on in life and what seems to work out fine, but what of those of us that wish to try out a couple of first? Our need for a connection with the’right person’ is fuelling a growing sector of online dating and matchmaking services.
Research
Surprisingly however, with all the gadgetry and profile fitting database gobbldeygook accessible, a recent survey identified that from 900 subscribers 75% had not found what they were searching for. This means making the ideal choice is as ambiguous as ever. There are typical indicators that are appealing to all people. Most guys favour a slender waist, wide shoulders, full lips and soft features. Women, on the other hand often favor masculine facial features, powerful broad shoulders, clear skin and a well-balanced bodily appearance.
All of which signify virility, sexual potency and superior genes. On a subconscious level there are different factors at work. There’s evidence that indicates that we could be drawn to individuals that possess a specific set of genes, called the major histocompatibility complex, or MHC for short. Partners whose MHC genes disagree have an increased ability to fight off illness and disease and are most likely to make children with strong immune systems. Data proves that we will probably make decisions toward individuals who appeal to us in this manner.
Let’s see…
So how can you find somebody who has different MHC to yours? Well, the jury is still out. However, it is thought that odor has something to do with it. Some studies suggest that people are more drawn to the scent of clothes worn by those with dissimilar MHC. This is what we refer to sexual chemistry. However, there are a few caveats. Hormone contraceptives can make girls favour men who is MHC genes are very similar to their own. Not ideal. Male attraction can vary based on a woman’s menstrual cycle. And female attraction can change whenever there are changes within the cycle too.
So the point is, the path to appeal and love could be a bit like playing the lottery, especially for women. So, when gender is factored into the equation, things can become even more confusing. After sex, the brain releases a chemical that may give the brain a warm feeling of calmness, love and creating bonds that prepare for raising a family. So having sex on impulse may give you feelings toward someone who might be completely wrong for you. It’s believed that the purpose of love leads us to believe that we’ve found our one true mate amongst a selection of billions.
Remember
Sex, on the other hand, takes care of reproduction, the gap between the two is apparent. Our ancestors might have thought that feelings of love would’stop’ our hunt for a mate and commit us to a single person. We then get down to the practice of mating with one another. That is all well and good, but how do we finally settle on a decision with the perfect mate? Studies have found that the optimum number of alternatives, before whittling down the actual favourites should be 9%.
Out of every 100 ‘favourites’ blatantly met, you should study 9. Any less and you won’t have processed enough information to create an acceptable option. Any more, and the odds of passing the best one by will increase. There’s a possibility that this study underestimates the complexity of finding an ideal partner in the actual world, however the principle is clear.
Final note
Don’t hunt for a long time, or you could risk missing the excellent possibilities and run out of time. Clearly, who we fall for and the choices we make are subject to a lot of distinct factors. We’re aware of some and not others. Opportunity can play its part too, particularly if we meet someone after determining and confirming our goals, or in a specific stage in the menstrual cycle. Indeed, there could be someone special out there, but they might not be the only one.